Homeopathic hilarity.

on December 23, 2008 in Ze Bloggy Goodness with 14 comments by

So I go to a homeopathic doctor.  Don’t judge me.  Cause I totally love it and you would too.  I’ve been going for about a year and since I started, my migraines have decreased by 95% and I no longer drink caffeine. AND I’M STILL A NICE PERSON.  Which is saying a lot.  And the people who work there are AWESOME.

I go see Doc about once a month for a little disease we like to call Nun-Ya-Biz-Itis.

I was talking with Sarah today and telling her about my appointment and she said, “Why do you never blog about that?” because today was mildly bizarro and totally blog-worthy.

First of all, when I sat down, Doc made me put my hand on this cut out of a hand that is made of metal.  I can’t find a picture online, but it looks like a big computer mouse with metal bars to put your fingers on.  So, my hand is there and Doc hits a button on the computer, and after about four minutes, all sorts of dots come up on the computer screen.

Doc “hmm….”s and “huhhh…”s and then says, “Annie, is the router for your wireless network in your bedroom?”

I was shocked.  My eyes bugged out cause I don’t know about you, but I think that is FREAK-EE that he can know that.  And it sorta made me feel like I was in trouble.

And I slowly said, “yyyeeeaahh…”

Doc said, “well, you should probably turn it off at night.”

I nodded in agreement.  Mainly because I was speechless.  And I hate to get in trouble.  [First child syndrome to the max.]

Another click on the computer, another thoughtful moment, and Doc says, “Annie, do you feel cold a lot?”

Now, NO ONE knows this, but I FREEZE at night.  In fact, I sleep in fleece socks, fleece pants, short sleeve tshirt, long sleeve tshirt, and a fleece pullover.  I cover up with a sheet, down comforter, blue blanket, and heavy blanket from Mexico.  And I usually pull the blankets up over my head because, and this is an interesting fact, my nose can not handle the cold.

[My mother says that is too personal to tell you, but I have no problem with you knowing that I have a blanket from Mexico.]

So at this point, I’m staring at him like he’s about to tell me the name of my husband [please] and the amount of money in my bank account [no thank you].  And I answer, “Yes, actually. Nashville is kinda cold and my bedroom is particularly cold.”

“Well, you need to warm it up.”

“Yes sir,” I replied, lifting my jaw off the floor.

“And I think that some light therapy might help.” And with that he tells me to follow him and hands me a pair of turquoise-lensed glasses.

So I don’t know what you were doing from 9-9:30am EST, but I was sitting in a room, door closed with overhead lights off, rocking a cool pair of glasses, while a three foot long bright blue strobe light blinked in my face.

I may have had a few seizures, but it was totally worth it.

Because THAT is a great story.  And I live for that junk.

*Update- 1000 words done yesterday.  Yay!  29,000 to go!!*

14 comments

  1. Southern Gal
    posted on Dec 23, 2008 at 9:07 AM  |  reply

    My son’s bedroom has the router in it. Would love to know the problem the doc is seeing with that.

    I won’t tell you about the pharmacist in our town who does homeopathic biz-nazz. And about how he got my son to hold a bottle of medicine over his sternum in one hand and put pressure on the other arm by his side and how his arm lifted and, and….I just won’t go into all that here.

  2. posted on Dec 23, 2008 at 9:48 AM  |  reply

    Very interesting. My oldest son has the router in his room, so I will have to tell him to turn it off at night.

    I understand the nose-getting-cold issue, because I have always slept the same way. A cold nose is not pleasant.

  3. posted on Dec 23, 2008 at 1:14 PM  |  reply

    I sleep BETTER with a cold nose. Ask your doctor what that means.

  4. posted on Dec 23, 2008 at 1:58 PM  |  reply

    ok. can we have dr.blue light as a series. everytime you go, please blog. =)

  5. posted on Dec 23, 2008 at 2:07 PM  |  reply

    yeah about the 1,000 words **dances** and LOL about the mom thinks blanket from Mexico is too personal (I totally got that one ;))i wonder what the router thing was all about?? lol abot the seizures too!!! Merry Christmas!!

  6. posted on Dec 23, 2008 at 2:19 PM  |  reply

    Hmmmm… the router used to be under my baby’s bed. What in the world???

  7. Face
    posted on Dec 23, 2008 at 2:40 PM  |  reply

    Yeah- I want to hear more about the router, bc ours is in our room, too. And it used to be in Sam’s. Though he’s a dream child so maybe it’s a good thing.

  8. posted on Dec 23, 2008 at 2:44 PM  |  reply

    I want to hear more about that router!

    I’ve been in and out of doctor’s offices like CRAZY the past 2 days, and I have no fun stories. I think I might have to switch to a homeopathic guy, because it seems a lot more entertaining! haha 🙂

  9. posted on Dec 23, 2008 at 4:09 PM  |  reply

    Hi there,

    Wireless routers give off MICROWAVE radiation, which is dangerous to the human body. Check it out on the net.

    I am homeopathy fan but it involves actually taking homeopathic medicines.

    It sounds like this comment is probably kinesiology (check it out on internet).’And about how he got my son to hold a bottle of medicine over his sternum in one hand and put pressure on the other arm by his side and how his arm lifted and, and….I just won’t go into all that here.’
    Louise

  10. posted on Dec 23, 2008 at 4:17 PM  |  reply

    Wow! I LMAO, but
    I need MUCH more info here. I suffer (is there a stronger word than just *suffer*) from migraines and I’m in the lead-up to one right now. Due to hit on Christmas day. (tomorrow..*sob sob sob*)

    So what does the light and glasses do? I hoped it helped.

  11. posted on Dec 23, 2008 at 5:19 PM  |  reply

    When you put your hand in that thing, do you get HD channels too?

  12. posted on Dec 24, 2008 at 1:36 AM  |  reply

    My uncle is a naturopathic doctor and people always look at me strange when I say that he’s the only one who knew how to help with some health stuff I had a few years back when regular doctors said there was nothing to be done. Yeah… some of his stuff is weird… but I know that whatever he did helped!

  13. Emily Siren
    posted on Dec 24, 2008 at 8:38 PM  |  reply

    I love light therapy! Quantum physics says it gives one the ability to think more clearly, particularly when the need arises to make decisions. At first I thought it was cookoo but it really does help! 🙂

  14. Heather
    posted on Jan 06, 2009 at 3:07 PM  |  reply

    wait..I think I saw this on a scene of LOST…..

Join the discussion

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Get a sneak peek of Annie’s latest book! Click the link to download two free chapters of Let’s All Be Brave.