I hate it. I think I hate my new camera. Here’s why.

For starters, on the setting dial, there is no running man. Know what I mean? That symbol that looks like a, well … a man running. It’s a great setting for capturing moving people with no blur.

This new camera is trying to tell me that “kids and pets” setting will do the same job. Tell that to Matt Stafford- “by the way, my camera says I can photograph you throwing a touchdown pass using the same setting as when I photograph a kitty cat rubbing up against a couch.”

I would never photograph a kitty cat rubbing up against a couch.

Oh, ok Canon company, it works just the same. Ok. Great.Not.

Barnes wasn’t moving that much. To give you a reference point, he was somewhere between a snake and a mongoose…and a panther. (that’s for you Office fans out there) But really, he was probably faster than the average kitty rubbing a couch; but definitely slower than the shafted Georgia Bulldogs’ quarterback. Obviously movement that was in the range of Kids and Pets.

Not to mention, the good ole running man was my partner in crime- I use that setting all the time. Kids and pets? Who do you think I am, Canon? Someone to be toyed with?

Secondly, my camera has the LONGEST delay time in the free world between photograph and being ready to take another picture. Seriously, nine seconds. NINE! Trust me, these people timed it at the concert.These two yo-yos, Davis and Ashley, would take a picture then set the timer on Davis’s watch to see how long until the flash was reset. I appreciated their scientific approach, but I was mad as a wet hen at my brand-spankin new camera …. that I had researched and compared and shopped around for …. then had to wait in line for at FedEx (because they only deliver during school hours) while I was exposed to many diseases and weird people in rubber gloves …. only to have the flash need a nap between each picture. Did I buy my camera from the 1976 store? Geez.

Proof of my anger, you say? Besides the previous rant?

Davis says, “Annie, make a face that tells us how you feel about your new camera.” And I didn’t even have to work at it. It was there. Ashley couldn’t even look. Katie B, on my other side, hid her face from mine. She knows.Please. Look at my face. If you actually know me, which some of you do, but some of you don’t, then you know I don’t frown like that all too often. And those are, in fact, my mad frog eyes. That, my bloggites, is a P-Oed Annie.

[I just looked back at my camera on my bedside table and thought, “I feel kinda bad for saying all of this.” As if my camera has feelings. I am four shades of crazy.]

Anyways, I’m not jumping the gun yet. I have the number to use to return it. But I’m trying to be smart and read the owner’s manual first. I’m thinking this camera may have enough bells and whistles and things I will love eventually that I will overlook these faults, huge as they are.

I mean, it takes good pictures. It is light. It has some cool stuff. So maybe I don’t “hate it” exactly.

I’m just whining because I miss the running man.