So I’m going to talk about it.

on January 16, 2012 in (in)courage with 6 comments by

Last month I wrote an article on (in)courage about being single.

And then it got 450ish comments.

Good. Gravy. Boat.

For the last few weeks since that post exploded, I have labored over what to do next. It has been a recurring theme in my prayers, my thoughts, and my conversations- “how do I love and lead and live well before these single women?” I feel a real responsibility to that community. Meanwhile, I worry that talking about being single will make cute boys who read my blog run the other way. But this feels like a door God has swung wide open, so I tell those irrational fears to Shut Up Please and then I keep writing.

For as long as this gal stays single, I’m going to talk honestly about it.

I think that’s the best thing I can do, right?

I can’t say it enough- I know like I know like I know that today is the day to share hope. While I want to have my own family someday, I can’t even begin to express how great life is- single or married- when God is allowed to author the story.

And while “Single in 2012” wasn’t a chapter I was expecting Him to write, the details have been phenomenal and the story arch is the most interesting thing I’ve ever seen.

So three cheers to a New Year full of honest talks about the beauty and the beast that is singleness.

I’m the batter up over at (in)courage again today, where I’ve written five new choices I’m making in 2012. I’d love for you to pop over there and join in the linky conversation.

Based on the comments last time, I’m thinking this could be a big day for some of our singlet friends.

I know my day will be full of whispered prayers for these girls. Will you pray for them right now too? The single gals out there who need to make some new choices this year? And in 2013, we will look back and realize that God took our tiny prayers and changed some lives. Booyah.

. . . . .

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To my married friends, I’d love for you to share some wisdom in the comments today- what are some choices that singlets should be making?


  1. posted on Jan 16, 2012 at 5:58 AM  |  reply

    Looking from the outside –
    I would want to focus on what the day holds for me right now. The present. Even married folk can wish their lives away or not live in the now as we’re waiting for the next big thing on the calendar. It’s not the way we were called to live. So single or married I would suggest what Ann Voskamp wrote about in One Thousand Gifts: A Dare to Live Fully Right Where You Are.
    (I clicked over to read your (in)courage article and see that you say it even better. Enjoy who you are and where you are. Good advice for everyone.)

  2. posted on Jan 16, 2012 at 9:03 AM  |  reply

    I have always said that I would not have chosen my husband for myself (i.e. the first time I met him, he was wearing suspenders. SUSPENDERS).
    But if it had been up to me, I would have been short changed and in truh-ble. I was picking guys for myself for years that reflected what I thought I deserved- not exactly the best fish in the sea, but they wanted to date me. But God thought better of me and blessed me with a man far better than I ever could have designed. Many of his traits that I love so much, I wouldn’t have even thought of.
    SO just remember that even though it can feel like God isn’t listening to your heart or concerned with a plan for you, He is. And he’ll probably surprise you.

    • Rebecca Jones
      posted on Jan 18, 2012 at 1:52 PM  |  reply

      @Natalie, I TOTALLY agree. When I met my sweet husband Jason, I was NOT interested at all, in any way. I think if he had been wearing suspenders I might have given him a second glance! HA!

      I was a newly single gal, a recent college graduate and career focused beyond focused. I was not wanting to get into another relationship, serious or platonic with a guy. I had had it! I was living “the” life. I had an amazing roommate. I had it all together… yeah right.

      Soon after our first meeting – we’re talking a month people – A MONTH… God showed himself to me through J.A.S.O.N. and I’ve never been more grateful. We were married a year later… and that was 6 1/2 years ago. 🙂 🙂 🙂

      He’s kind, thoughtful, loving, comforting, the yin to my wacky tacky yang, he supports me, encourages me, he LOVES our Lord and above all… he really does complete me in all the earthly ways. 🙂 He does. God knew was HE was doing.

      So… single ladies… STOP LOOKING! The ONE (Jesus) and the one will come in time. HE will guide you. HE will comfort you. HE will put you in the right place at the right time. TRUST IN HIM AND IN HIM ALONE.

  3. posted on Jan 16, 2012 at 9:07 AM  |  reply

    Thanks Annie!
    I’m going to be writing and sharing on all this as well, thanks to your post.
    Looking forward to seeing what all of us have to say.

  4. posted on Jan 16, 2012 at 9:13 AM  |  reply

    Proud of you for writing about this. Not always very easy! Every time you said “singlet” I thought “onesie”…a ridiculous mental image, ha!

  5. Erica
    posted on Jan 17, 2012 at 5:08 PM  |  reply

    I agree, I wasn’t expecting Single in 2012 at 27 to be my story, but here I am. I feel like God is doing some work in my heart about what it means to be single and live fully right now… but I can totally relate with the feeling that if I talk about it TOO much, the boys will run. 🙂 However, I work at a Christian university, and as I’ve experienced some heart change and surrender, even in the last few weeks, I can’t tell you how many amazing conversations I’ve had with single college gals about their worth in Christ while they’re single. Pretty incredible to be used… so much so that for about a split second of each of these convos I’ve thought, “no God, see I don’t want to be married because I’m having too much of an impact with these ladies!” But, I trust He knows my desires, and like you said, I’ve got to hope to give so I’m going to give it!

    I’m appreciating your words on singleness so so so much, both here and at (in)courage! And, btw, I’m reading the “How to Get a Date” book…. 🙂

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