Day 16 :: Siblings

on October 16, 2013 in 31 Ways To Speak Love with 6 comments by

31 waysI have a mom and a dad and two younger sisters. Well, we actually have two other “sisters”””my cousins Jake and Julianne. We get to spend a lot of time with them, so we consider them our sisters.

Yes, Jake is a boy, and yes, we call him our sister. And yes, we did make him wear footie pajamas one year on Christmas Eve, and yes, he was twenty-four years old.

Proof? Okay!! [Sorry Jake. Sorta. Okay not really. But a little.]


Julianne lived with my parents for the last two years of high school, and I’d like to publicly complain that she took my childhood bedroom. So for two whole years, every time I went to visit my parents, I had to sleep in the GUEST room. Phfff. Rude.

[Actually, it was fine and I totally love Julianne, so I’m not nearly as annoyed as I always told her I was. Hey, I’m the big sister. I gotta give her a little friendly trouble, right?]

Here they are without me. Rude that Atlanta has them all.

sister cousins

[Tatum is famous. That’s why she’s the only one wearing sunglasses.]

Being adult siblings is seriously different than being kids who fight and holler. It’s choosing to be friends and choosing to care and communicating on purpose since you probably don’t live in bedrooms across the hall from each other anymore.

How do you talk to your siblings? Do you talk to your siblings? What does it look like to have that relationship transform over the years?

All things we have to figure out.

No one else experienced you like your siblings. There are parts of my history that only my sisters [real and cousin-sisters] will understand. And there are ways I can speak life and death into their hearts in ways that no one else can.

I need to remember that.

I need to remember that they are listening. That I have a unique voice in their lives. And the same goes for them. They can say things to me that I can hear from them that no one else would know to say or be brave enough to say. And I need to remember that too- that I should speak love and listen when they do the same.


Awww… cute sisters.

Confession time: I’m not the best sister. I’m just not great at it. But Tatum and Sally are great at it, so I watch them and applaud them and hope I teach my kids how to be like them.

. . . . .


I just started a group text between my sisters and cousins and mainly used emojis, but I think they knew what I meant. Tonight, I’ll also holler at them each, say thanks and that I love them, and make sure they know why. The words always matter, but the WHY seems to be clutch, doesn’t it?

How about you call your siblings today? Or text them weird emojis? Or write on their facebook wall? Just something to say “I’m glad God put us in the same family.”

. . . . .

Tell me about your siblings in the comments. I’d love to hear.

This is Day 16 of 31 Ways to Speak Love. You can click here to see a list of all the posts in the series.


  1. posted on Oct 16, 2013 at 4:39 PM  |  reply

    I had the pleasure of getting to know Tatum in Ghana… and meeting Sally when she came to work at an orphanage there. I got to see the care these to sisters gave to each other, it was so precious and made me homesick for my sibs! I have two sisters and and a bro. Thanksgiving dinner rocked – we know how to get the other going. We can go from zero to hysterics in less than 30 seconds. But we missed our older sister who couldn’t be there. We had to call and put her on speaker phone. I know I am blessed to have them. But you’re right, it does take effort. So worth it!

  2. Tab Smith
    posted on Oct 16, 2013 at 6:58 PM  |  reply

    Oh I love this. I am the eldest of three girls and am the only one who doesn’t live near “home”. I’m so bad at letting an ocean and 6 hour time difference keep me from regular contact with my sisters. Thanks for this.

  3. Heather
    posted on Oct 16, 2013 at 8:57 PM  |  reply

    One brother and two sisters, all younger. We all live in the same city currently but I lived away for nearly 8 years. We’re close, but we certainly didn’t communicate the same way then as we do now. The face-to-face communication is easier somehow.

    Thanks Annie for the reminder that we can speak life and death into the hearts of our sibs. That is SO true. We know where it hurts the most and I know I’ve been guilty of that.

  4. Pam
    posted on Oct 17, 2013 at 7:54 AM  |  reply

    Absolutely love this post! I have 2 younger sisters and we are close (as far as heart close). One lives in another state and two of us live within an hour from one another. The one who lives nearest to me always calls to talk to me on her way home from work. I LOVE that time to connect with her, and if for some reason she doesn’t call, I miss it. It’s fun to be more than just sisters but friends. We talk about life, our families, our children and how to balance it all. We all love JESUS, so our spiritual walks are often talked about. We love to get together for holidays, birthdays, and any other special day we can think of : ) I love my sisters and am so glad I have them!

    I’m a new reader of your blog and LOVE what I’m readin’ in this 31 day series. I feel sure I’ll be hanging around long after the 31 days is up.

    Thank you for writing what you do and how you do. It’s touching me.

  5. posted on Oct 17, 2013 at 10:30 AM  |  reply

    I’ve got a younger sister who’s quite close in age to me. Our lives are very different: I’m unemployed, she has a very demanding job etc. God has answered my prayers because our relationship didn’t used to be good but has been better these last couple of years. I love talking to her and love her honesty.

  6. posted on Oct 18, 2013 at 9:42 PM  |  reply

    I have 3 siblings. My sister and I are very close and speak at least twice a week. My brothers and I do not speak often. I think about them a lot and wonder how to improve things. It is not that we don’t get along it is that we all love very different lives that never intersect

Join the discussion

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Get a sneak peek of Annie’s latest book! Click the link to download two free chapters of Let’s All Be Brave.