31 Days of Jokes

31 Days of Jokes :: 32 Posts + 45 Jokes

on November 1, 2012 in 31 Days of Jokes, TOP 5 FRIDAY with 1 comment by

Why 31 Days of Jokes?

Day 1 : Accessorize

Day 2 : Aging Swimmers

Day 3 : Pappy

Day 4 : Spicy

Day 5 : Top 5 Friday – your jokes!

Day 6 : Good one, man.

Day 7 : Delayed

Day 8 : Kernel

Day 9 : I have an equestrian.

Day 10 : Burn

Day 11 : Collegiate

Day 12 : Top 5 Friday – your jokes!

Day 13 : All over the news.

Day 14 : Snap and Crackle

Day 15 : Hip

Day 16 : Weigh In

Day 17 : Bert

Day 18 : Will Smith

Day 19 : Top 5 Friday- your jokes!

Day 20 : Close one.

Day 21 : It’s your birthday

Day 22 : The joke’s on me.

Day 23 : Snoozle.

Day 24 : On the line.

Day 25 : Speak French.

Day 26 : Boyz.

Day 27 : Gators

Day 28 : Palm Sunday

Day 29 : French feet

Day 30 : Nice to meat you.

Day 31 : The best for last.

Day 31: The best for last.

on October 31, 2012 in 31 Days of Jokes with 7 comments by

I saved the best comedian for today.

It’s my Dad. He calls himself “The Funny Man.” I tend to agree.

[But if you ask anyone in my family, they would say I always tend to agree with my Dad. It’s true. I’m a fan.]

You may remember, or maybe you are newer around here, but my Dad has actually been in a comedy contest. And he came in second. It was one of the top nights in our family’s life.

So I thought there is no finer way to end the month than to get my favorite comedian to tell us a joke.

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A guy goes to the doctor and he has a carrot in his nose and celery in his ear.

He says, “Doctor, I don’t feel too well.”

And the doctor says, “Well, I can see you haven’t been eating right.”

. . . . .

Perfection. Well done, Daddy.

Hope you guys have loved this month as much as I have.

Thanks for your laughs.

 

Day 30: Nice to meat you.

on October 30, 2012 in 31 Days of Jokes with 3 comments by

. . . . .

What do you call a cow with no legs?

Ground beef!

What do you call a cow with two legs?

Lean meat!

What do you call a cow with one leg?

Steak!

Day 29: French feet.

on October 29, 2012 in 31 Days of Jokes with 10 comments by

Since we all seemed to enjoy the French joke last week, here’s another doozie from the other side of the Atlantic.

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What do you call a Frenchman wearing sandals?

Philippe Philoppe.

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If you only knew how hard I laughed at this joke. I mean, doubled over. I mean, telling it over and over again. I mean, a new classic in the AnnieBlogs joke vault.

Yes, there is a vault.

Happy Monday.

Day 28: Palm Sunday.

on October 28, 2012 in 31 Days of Jokes with 3 comments by

This video. You have to watch it. There are not words to tell this joke. It’s that funny.

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I love a good interrupting starfish.

Day 27: Gators.

on October 27, 2012 in 31 Days of Jokes with 3 comments by

In honor of the Georgia Bulldogs playing the Florida Gators today, I have a reptile themed joked for you.

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What do you call an alligator wearing a vest?

An investigator!

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[Here’s what. There are a LOT of hilarious Florida Gator jokes, but when they are #2 in the nation, I really have no room to trash talk. So we went with a funny and un-zingy joke.]

Go dawgs sic ’em!

Day 26: Boyz.

on October 26, 2012 in 31 Days of Jokes, Dude Stuff with 3 comments by

Happy Friday. I know you are expected five jokes, but really- this one is worth five jokes. So, be happy with one.

Also, we haven’t had a serious dude joke yet- so this one is it. For sures.

So I called on my favorite boyz, Connor and Keenan, to tell you a joke. You know them – I blogged about them a few months ago. I’m not going to get all sappy on a Friday joke day, but trust me, I could. I could get stupid sappy about how wonderful these guys are and how grateful I am to call them my little bros [who are “little” in age, not in height or smarts or heart].

Anyways. Enough sappy. But on top of being awesome, they tell great jokes. Please enjoy.

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What is invisible and smells like carrots?

Rabbit farts.

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So those are my boys. I love them. Now you can see why.

You’re welcome.

Day 25: Speak French.

on October 25, 2012 in 31 Days of Jokes with 7 comments by

My friend Beth from Red and Honey gave me today’s joke. Her blog is adorbs, you should see it. She’s Canadian, so she’s got that going for her. Also, her joke involves knowing how to count to five in French. So if you don’t know how to do that, google that first.

Then proceed to Beth’s very funny joke. Or, at least, my poor retelling of Beth’s funny joke.

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Two cats were in a boat race.

The American cat was named “One Two Three Cat.”

The Canadian cat was named “Un Deux Trois Cat.”

Do you know which cat won the race?

The American cat.

Because Un Deux Trois Cat Sank.

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Get it?

Day 24: On the line.

on October 24, 2012 in 31 Days of Jokes with 2 comments by

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Why did the lion eat the tight rope walker?

He wanted a balanced meal.

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Day 23: Snoozle.

on October 23, 2012 in 31 Days of Jokes with 3 comments by

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What do you call a male cow who is taking a nap?

A BULL DOZER.

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So much yes. I love this one.

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