I’m broken. For the last few weeks, some small part in me has not been working right. I can’t pinpoint it. But I can tell you that I haven’t felt like myself.

Because this is my blog and not my journal, I’m keeping the details of this to myself. I think I know how I got here. Maybe not. Regardless, its been less-than-fun on the inside.

But here’s the beautiful thing about this whole process: I found ways to get fixed. Solutions that didn’t involve a lot of Christianese and a lot of formulas- “do this and you’ll be fine”, “do these three things and God will make things all better”, etc.

Sometimes I always think that if I work hard enough, I can work my way out of any hurt and pain. If I just do the good things enough, the broken will fix itself. You know what I did instead? I quit caring about what I thought was the *right* thing to do, and I did what my heart wanted to do.

I went to see my family.

I spent time with my best friends.

I read a book that wasn’t bossy.

I listened to five episodes of “This American Life”.

I talked to God. In fact, He fixed me. It wasn’t my doing. But He fixed me by letting me live. Really live.

There’s a lot too this, more details that I am keeping to myself. So maybe all of this doesn’t even make any sense to you. Sorry if that’s the case.

But I guess I just wanted you to know- if you feel like you are the only one who is broken, you aren’t.

These verses have become very important to me in the last 2 days. And I’m grateful that a friend sent it to me at just the right moment.

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Habakkuk 3:17-19 (The Message)

Though the cherry trees don’t blossom and the strawberries don’t ripen,
Though the apples are worm-eaten and the wheat fields stunted,
Though the sheep pens are sheepless and the cattle barns empty,
I’m singing joyful praise to God.
I’m turning cartwheels of joy to my Savior God.
Counting on God’s Rule to prevail, I take heart and gain strength.

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There’s nothing like a positive, uplifting, lighthearted post for your Monday morning.

[And that was NOTHING like a positive, uplifting, lighthearted post.]

[That joke was so predictable.]

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