Step #3

on January 26, 2008 in Ze Bloggy Goodness with 13 comments by

In normal world (i.e- not teacher world), you give your employer two weeks notice before you leave. Am I correct? I mean, I remember the days of old, pre-degree, when I was a waitress. [At PoFolks, just for your information.] And I recall calculating when I wanted to quit and then knowing exactly what day to put in my 2 week notice. To be honest, I was tired of smelling like biscuits and green beans. I had to get out of there.

And a friend of mine, the corporate type, just got an awesome new job in the downtown ATL. To listen to her describe the interview process, negotiations, resignations, and bonus-ations [I made that up] was quite enlightening. The world is far more like Ally McBeal than I ever realized. And as I talked to corporate friend, I remembered that normal workers can switch jobs any time of the year. Not just August.

Do you remember when you were little and your entire life revolved around a SCHOOL calendar, not a REAL calendar? I still say “this year” referring to August 07. “Next year” is August 08. I have multi-year years. You don’t. Because you are normal.

There are many advantages to this calendar and this profession. Namely
1) June
2) July
3) 2 weeks at Christmas
4) Spring Break “Yeah baby! WHOO HOO!! SB08!!” [I have no real cause to do that, it just always feels like the correct response when saying “Spring Break”, doesn’t it?]

But there are disadvantages. Like when you have to sign an intent form for your principal in January 08 that determines your job life from August 08 to May 09. Gracious. That is a long time away. And every year it makes me break out in cold sweats to plan that far in advance.

Not this year.

I walked in to my Principal’s office Tuesday morning and handed her my intent form. She hugged me, smiled, and said, “I’m so proud of you”. That’s a good leader.

She knew before I even showed her the paper. I won’t be going back to Woodstock Elementary School after this year ends. In fact, I won’t be teaching at all for the 08-09 year.

I’m going to try to be a writer. The real kind. The going after a dream kind. The “if God doesn’t show up for me financially I don’t know what I’ll do” kind. [I think I just threw up in my mouth a little- still working this faith thing out.]

The taking step #3 kind.

But starting in June, I get to live by a normal calendar for the first time in my life, though I fear that a school calendar is so ingrained into my mind that all things will work on a 180 day schedule for the rest of my life. I’m okay with that if I can keep that June/July part.

I couldn’t write about it before today because there were two terribly important kids that I wanted to tell personally. We go get smoothies on Fridays after school; it’s our tradition. We drive through neighborhoods and pick out houses to live in when “we grow up”, we play random games with the radio, we talk about God and baptism, and we always laugh about things. And sometimes I think one of the main reasons God brought me to WES is for them. And He probably brought them to WES for me. The idea that they would hear of my leaving from a teacher, or (God forbid) a teacher’s kid, freaked me out. So I kept it kinda quiet for their sake.

It’s hard to explain to 4th and 5th graders whom I LOVE that I feel God leading me away from them. That doesn’t fit into the God box in their head. So I prayed and prayed for God to show them Himself in our conversation today. Because I DESPERATELY want them to love God MORE because of our friendship, not be saddened by His ways.

I cried dribbly tears as I told them, their faces blanking out on me in defense mode. Their laughter gone, stoic faces in place. My smoothie turned sour. And all I could think was, “God, this better be Your plan because I’m hurting them.” No eye contact. No one really spoke much as we got to their home. The parents already knew- I teach with the mom and I consider them good friends- so they were prepared for a less than enthusiastic entrance.

It was awful, to be certain.

I have to wonder. Is this what Jesus means by losing your life? Maybe. It sure feels like it.

Matthew 16:25
“For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for Me will find it.”

Pray for these two friends of mine, as you pray for my stepping, that God would be their rock. That they would know His great love for them. I’m praying that the boy would grow up to be a mighty man of God who stands by his beliefs and leads others with Godly wisdom. I’m praying that the girl will cultivate a gentle and quiet spirit that trusts Him at every turn and is strong in her convictions.

And I’m believing that they will both be braver for God because of this.

13 comments

  1. Marie-Claire
    posted on Jan 26, 2008 at 4:59 AM  |  reply

    I’ve been waiting for this post. I’m so excited!!! Leaving somewhere you feel comfortable is hard, I know how it feels. But then again, so do you. And who knows, maybe you’ll have company up there. 🙂 Although what you said is true, there would be no making-of-friends. Complete contentment in what’s already there. Is this making any sense?

    Anyway, I’m praying. For the kids, for you, and other stuff. And I’m so excited for you.

  2. steve and randel hambrick
    posted on Jan 26, 2008 at 2:00 PM  |  reply

    whoo hooo! and the adventure begins…

    are you finished at WES as of yesterday?? or are you finished after this school year? not sure i picked that part up.

  3. Annie
    posted on Jan 26, 2008 at 3:11 PM  |  reply

    Marie, I only want to make friends up there with 2 specific people. You know who it is- we were born to be bfries with them. 🙂

    Randel, I’ll finish out this year for sure. I just had to give her my intent for the 08-09 year. I’m crazy, but I ain’t that crazy!!

    That part was confusing- chalk it up to blogging late at night. I fixed it though. Sorry.

  4. Marie-Claire
    posted on Jan 26, 2008 at 7:00 PM  |  reply

    so true. I will be very disappointed if you aren’t playing Catchphrase with them by christmas ’08.

  5. Melinda
    posted on Jan 26, 2008 at 8:55 PM  |  reply

    I just signed a letter of intent saying I wasn’t going to be back at AIS the next year. It felt good to check “no.” I’m scared about the future, I’m not sure how well I’m going to do with this whole college/America/missing my Mommy thing. But I’m sure I’ll make it, I’m sure God will be there, and I am DEFINITELY sure that as long as you’re still blogging, I’ll still be reading.

  6. h.
    posted on Jan 26, 2008 at 9:44 PM  |  reply

    i like the term “bonus-ation” .. corporate h will have to remember that 🙂 haha.

    i’m proud of you! it’s so courageous to take that first step to leave one thing and take the big leap into the next thing.. go girl, get that adventure on!

    and you are SOOO right about the school calendar…i think that’s why i’m always ready to change jobs after approximately 10 months.

    wv:phshvjmx
    second wv: eglnm , eggleston, new mexico???

  7. Amy Rakes
    posted on Jan 26, 2008 at 11:05 PM  |  reply

    I’m proud of you and scared for you at the same time. There’s always an opening at my house for a full time nanny/maid/chef.

  8. carolineb
    posted on Jan 26, 2008 at 11:20 PM  |  reply

    Get us in, Annie. We’re counting on you.

  9. Jess $
    posted on Jan 28, 2008 at 3:50 AM  |  reply

    anya- i am so proud of you and inspired by you.

  10. jenny
    posted on Jan 28, 2008 at 10:40 PM  |  reply

    WOW. you’re a marvel.

  11. KateVonGlahn
    posted on Jan 29, 2008 at 12:38 AM  |  reply

    It’s going to be so good. I can’t wait to see what He does.

  12. Jennifer Bennett, MACE, LPC, LPF
    posted on Jan 29, 2008 at 11:13 PM  |  reply

    It has been such a joy and encouragement to read your blog. As I read your blog today about you taking a step towards your dream, I could not help but be extremely excited for you! May God bless you in ways that you can’t even begin to imagine!

  13. Annie
    posted on Jan 30, 2008 at 4:19 AM  |  reply

    To all of you- thank you for the encouragement. We will see what happens. More exciting news to come….

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