Step #4

on January 31, 2008 in Ze Bloggy Goodness with 12 comments by

I’m selling my house.

My sweet little house has truly been a refuge and a creative center for me. It has been peaceful even when life wasn’t. I love the paint colors and the decorations and my furniture, including the most expensive red couch in the entire hemisphere. [Ok, that’s an exaggeration … maybe … but it sure felt true when I bought it.]

This little home has been the location of many Bible study nights (Give it up, She-Ra girls!), Christmas parties, goodbye parties, move ins, move outs, slumber parties, set-ups (yeah Candace and Jason), break ups, tears, laughter, dinners, lunches, ice cream in abundance. And many days I just sat in my white chair and a half, looked out the window as the sun shone in, and fell asleep to the sound of nothing.

It’s been the perfect home for me.

Is it really true that all good things must come to an end? I’m not talking Heaven, don’t go there, Sammy Spiritual. But honestly, thinking of earthly things, they all come to an end, don’t they?

I’ve been really pondering it. Because I so anticipate what is coming next that I have moments where I think “if this doesn’t hurry up I’m going to explode”. Then there are other moments where my brain screams “Get me the heck off this train to Change-ville!!!” And I wish none of you knew my plans so I could just bail and not let this season of my life end. But that’s stupid and not God, although it sounds easy. I don’t want owning this house to end.

But I do. In order to get the next best thing God has for me, I have to give up the current good thing.

Which is weird. But true. Take it to the bank- you have to give up good for best. You have to give up now for then. You have to give up here for there. Every good thing cost something. Even salvation- it’s free for US, not for Him.

I want you to hear something. The reason this blog exists, the reason this post exists, the reason I exist- it’s not for me. I write all this, add a spice of humor, and give you my current plans because I CAN NOT CONTAIN my delight in how God is showing up for me. I have never known Him like this- because I’ve never been willing to trust like this. And I will never be the same.

I will never be the same because of Him. I will never be the same thanks to Him.

And I want so badly for you to be braver than me. I want the world to be changed because you realized that God deserves your trust. I guess I can’t guarantee that THE world will change, but I know YOUR world will change. And isn’t that enough? Maybe if we each changed our own world, THE world would change, too? Roll that one around a bit….

So my attempt-to-be-brave-in-08 plan is to sell the house [pray!] then move back in with the ole parentals for a while to save up the doll hairs. [that’s dollars, for you non-David Spade fans.]

What could the next step be after quitting grad school, abandoning my career (after June), and moving home in order to squirrel away money?

Ask Danny Garmin.

Chew on these verses for a while. Read them until they are true. You’ll know when they are true to you- your insides will expand until your chest cavity feels like it can’t contain your heart. And that’s the moment you remember that God isn’t a part of your life, He IS your life. Because no one else is worthy.

Lamentations 3: 21-25

Yet this I call to mind and therefore I have hope:

Because of the LORD’s great love we are not consumed, for His compassions never fail.


They are new every morning; great is Your faithfulness.


I say to myself, “The LORD is my portion; therefore I will wait for Him.”


The LORD is good to those whose hope is in Him, to the one who seeks Him.

Amen.

12 comments

  1. Jess $
    posted on Jan 31, 2008 at 4:24 AM  |  reply

    I miss “doll hairs”!!! Annie- I miss you.

  2. nysewanders
    posted on Jan 31, 2008 at 4:28 AM  |  reply

    Bravo my friend! Just so you know, you have been somewhat of a recent fuel for my fire. I realize there are desires and gifts in me that I have never acknowledged, probably out of fear, but that I need to give into them. So thanks for your crazy boldness and for being so darn honest about life.

  3. Melinda
    posted on Jan 31, 2008 at 6:53 AM  |  reply

    I think the reasons why you write your blog are some of the reasons I love it. Because even when things aren’t going your way God’s goodness seeps out all over the internet and splashes into my life all the way over here. I read this blog daily to soak it up, to remind me that it’s out there. I haven’t learned to see Him like that yet. I’ve definitely not learned to write Him down on paper like that yet.

  4. Annie
    posted on Jan 31, 2008 at 11:43 AM  |  reply

    Jess- it’s getting ridiculous. We need to hang.

    Bekah- Stop it. You are too kind. Wish you were coming to dinner next week.

    Melinda- Wow. Thank you so much. You give me far more credit than I deserve. And I bet that you see Him more than you realize. πŸ™‚ I think when you learn to WRITE it, you SEE it easier. Maybe?

  5. brad
    posted on Jan 31, 2008 at 3:19 PM  |  reply

    Glover will deliver.

    Got a funny story for you bout that.

  6. Tyler R
    posted on Jan 31, 2008 at 4:06 PM  |  reply

    I love that line about giving up the good for the best. Nicely put. Oh yea-I always say people don’t preach from Lamentations enough. Maybe you can help remedy that!

  7. Boggsy
    posted on Jan 31, 2008 at 5:47 PM  |  reply

    Excellent word Annie. I’m left encouraged and motivated!

  8. KateVonGlahn
    posted on Jan 31, 2008 at 9:20 PM  |  reply

    It’s gonna be good. I’m excited to watch what He does for you on your journey. Thanks for letting me be a part of it.

  9. eiks
    posted on Jan 31, 2008 at 10:06 PM  |  reply

    Hey!
    I LOVE your blog!! I have my own:
    thiswillallmakeperfectsensesomeday.blogspot.com πŸ™‚

    interesting, in your post you mention moving back in with your parents to save money. Hmmm…I may or may not have sent my parents a similar email this morning, telling them I’m coming back this May to save my dollars (or…doll hairs?) to see if we can make Nashville happen. πŸ™‚

    way to take some steps toward living the dream. πŸ™‚

  10. Sharliss Jane Arnold
    posted on Feb 01, 2008 at 2:26 AM  |  reply

    Oh My Annie, I breath deep for you. I am proud and must admit, wish I had the opportunties that await you. I pray you will not only be covered in prayer but that you would feel it like a warm blanket. Blessings to you.

  11. Annie
    posted on Feb 01, 2008 at 2:47 AM  |  reply

    Brad- I heart him. He’s cool.

    Tyler- I SO agree. Anything worthy to be lamented over should be a sermon series.

    Or maybe I’ll write a book?

    Boggsy- thank you.

    Kate- You have always spoken truth to me, thank you.

    Andrea- booyah. πŸ™‚

    Sharliss- I love y’all.

  12. Shannon
    posted on Feb 01, 2008 at 10:25 PM  |  reply

    Big steps of faith always yield big things from God…in due time! Congrats Annie. Keep going!

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